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Welcome back, friend—you’re one of 1002 human connection professionals who read or listen to this.
Can you share this with one facilitator, community-builder, or human connection professional? It would mean a lot to me. Win personalized zoom parties, dance videos, and party shades from me.
—Jacques W. Martiquet, The Party Scientist
🔬 EXPERIMENT #25—RESULTS 🔬
Over the weekend, I was leading an adult summer camp. I led multiple experiences, including a pillow fight, a ratchet dance workshop, and plenty of karoake. Lots of lessons about human connection in this edition.
Principles I Learnt from Allies
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In every moment, you have the ability to choose love. When we open our hearts, when we take off our armour, we spread this in others.
—Thank you Nicole Gibson, CEO of LoveOutLoud
The essence of authentic communication is the explicit expression of your desires in your relationships. Don’t hide them.
—Thank you Michael Armstrong, brother, CEO of Deepshift
Digital optimism is the path to a more connected happy planet. We must not abandon the use of technology and hide in eco-villages. We, as human connection professionals, must learn how to scale intimacy.
—Thank you Solon Teal, friend, CEO of we.talk.social
Celebrate others when they confess to you. When they confess their mental health, when they confess they’ve done wrong. When you celebrate the disclosures by others, you destigmatize honesty.
—Thank you Natalia, my co-facilitator, Comedian and School Teacher
True leadership is about putting yourself below your team members. Make it known that your role is to serve them, to coach them. Not to teach them.
—Thank you Julie, Cybersecurity Pro and Woke Manager
Stories, Lessons, and Fails
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Facilitation
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Notice disengagement, but don’t let it kill your confidence.
Noticing disengagement is the first step of intervening when your event is not going as planned. But when your observation leads you to give up or it sparks thoughts like “it’s over, I have failed” then you have a problem. The key is to celebrate disengagement—this is an opportunity to adjust your facilitation to your audience.
I facilitated a lot of exercises over the weekend. My favourite was the ratchet dance party. I created a playlist of rap and hip hop music containing a lot of invitations to shake your butt. It was very playful and edgy. Let’s just say, I wouldn’t offer this to a corporate client.
At the beginning of the experience, Natalia and I educated everyone about consent. We gave a specific hand symbol for people to use to communicate “I’m good, thank you.” Then, we lead some playfully sensual dance moves.
About 15 minutes into the experience, I noticed a collection of venue staff leave. Inside, it hurt. Why were they leaving? This was such a unique experience! I had never facilitated anything like it. And then, more people left.
I noticed myself getting demoralized, so I switched on hyperdrive. I caught myself. Immediately, I jumped into the crowd and gave so much love and attention to the 20 or so humans remaining. When I get demoralized, I have a choice—admit defeat and let a chain reaction of disengagement happen, or spice up the event with more electricity.
I spiced it up. After 15 minutes or so, everyone was having an incredible time. And then, I announced the lap dance performance. Edgy, I know..
At the end of the night, everyone was laughing and lit up.
In summary, lean into the experience when you notice disengagement.
Entrepreneurship
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Talk partnerships and synergies.
When you’re meeting someone for the first time, don’t forget to talk about their life purpose and goals. Can you help them? Is there more potential to this relationship than the connection in-the-moment? When you discuss how you might be able to help each other, the relationship can deepen to a purpose-driven relationship. Not just another social interaction.
Over the weekend, I met a lot of highly spiritual people. Now… did I develop purpose-driven relationships with a lot of them? No. They were beautiful interactions, but I really don’t think the relationships will last.
The longest-lasting relationships in my life are co-creative and purpose-driven. This means that there is a practical value exchange in the relationship. Example: They’re a human connection professional or conscious entrepreneur and we can teach each other things. Or, they’re a biohacker and we can exchange health wisdom.
Sometimes, I forget to explore this ‘mutual value exchange potential’ with people I meet. I forget to figure out how I can amplify their work. I forget to look for the partnership potential. To network more successfully and deepen your relationships beyond the joy of the moment, inquire more about how you can partner with the people you meet.
So next time you meet someone, ask them about their mission and vision. How can you help them fulfill it?
Find the ‘mutual value exchange potential.’
Performance
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Drink water. More water and better water.
A large majority of people are dehydrated, leading to physical exhaustion and drowsiness. To address this, I have built a habit—the first thing I do when I wake up is pour a large glass of water and go outside in the sun. I also always have a glass of water beside my computer. This ensures I stay hydrated.
But being a water pro goes deeper than this! Recently I learnt from Dave Asprey the power of EZ water, a specific form of water that forms in our cells. To increase the amount of EZ water in your body, blend your water before drinking it, take infrared saunas, and drink raw vegetable juices or fresh spring water. This water gives you more energy.
For a long time, I have neglected the power of water. I encourage you to pay more attention to the water you drink. Check your water quality and purchase a filter if necessary.
And don’t forget to get those infrared rays!
Insider Opportunities for the Lab
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1. PlayLab
NessLabs is another lab that I regularly participate in. It’s a newsletter and community for knowledge workers, neuroscience geeks, and productivity hackers. It’s incredibly affordable. It’s one of those communities that I pay close attention to. They have events every week. Learn more here. And join their weekly play-lab every week at 7AM PST.
2. Routines and Habits Masterclass
In the online Laboratory community, I will be leading a masterclass on routines and habits. This is for people who have self-invested in my subscription, for 20 USD/month. It is taking place in August.
The Party Scientist’s World 🥼
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Post I created—The art of personalized giving
On Instagram, I posted about the best gift I have ever received. Thank you Jacob from the All-in-onesie team.
Human I believe in—Solon Teal, CEO of Talk.Social
Solon and I had an invigorating chat about scaling intimacy. It’s crazy how much closeness and alignment can be created in 20 minutes. Check out his project. It’s an ambitious one.
Project I believe in—Seek Healing
I learnt about this social health services company from my friend Jason Digges. They are rethinking rehab and the solution to the opioid crisis, by integrating social health interventions into mainstream mental health services. I love their science-based approach.
What I listened to—Sleep Hacking, Decreasing Anxiety
I listened to Tim Ferris’ latest episode with a neurobiologist. Get ready for some body and mind optimization.
What I read—How to Start Prioritizing People Over Products and Creativity Over Consumption
Buddhist Economics—this article echoes some of the beliefs and research in my manifesto. Prepare for your money beliefs to change.
It is not wealth that stands in the way of liberation but the attachment to wealth; not the enjoyment of pleasurable things but the craving for them.
Who I researched—Human Connection Professionals
Jennifer, CEO of Seek Healing, Social Health Non-profit
Heidi Cuppari, CEO of Dreamtank, Intergenerational Entrepreneurship
Michael Armstrong, CEO of DeepShift, Death and Mortality Educator
Human Connection Challenge
—Film yourself dancing in public.
Dancing in public spreads human connection and trust. Tag me on IG Stories @JacquesMartiquet and I will send you some encouragement!
Reply right now with an action you’ll take to apply what you just read.
Be-you-tiful.
If this knowledge has been valuable to you and you want to express generosity for my work, you can make a one-time donation here.
Jacques W. Martiquet
International Party Scientist
BSc. Pharmacology
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