JOYMAKERđWEEKLY
The only Joymaker newsletter on the internet.
Vietnam and China have been eventful. Last night, I ignited a dance party on a cruise ship. The night before, we started a street party.
In this edition, youâll findâŚ
3 actionable tools to get more personal, interpersonal, and group joy.
1 question you can ask for deeper, happier conversations.
Wisdom from socializing at a Chinese spa, leading a 4 hour going-away lunch, and giving 100 balloons to Vietnamese people.
Next event? Apply for Joymaker Bootcamp â (12 spots left)
PERSONAL JOY đ§
⢠Stop the poison.
Fear-based media. Fried food. Unrefined sugar. Ambivalent friends. Critical friends. Polluted air. Distracting notifications. Alcohol. You get the idea.
Want to be the kind of leader everyone loves to be around?
My Joymaker Leadership Manual & Habit System teaches you 40 simple habits to unlock your natural charisma, spark joy in any room, and lead with contagious good energy. Warning: People will ask you to be friends!
RELATIONAL JOY đŤ
⢠Make requests.
Do not assume people know what you want. During my trip in Vietnam, one thing weâve practiced is letting each other know what we like and donât like. It reinforces trust and enhances enjoyment.
Want to host gatherings people never want to leave?
My Joymaker Games Vault includes 130+ of my favorite connection games â tested on streets and stages in 15+ countries â to help you create laughter, warmth, and real human connection every time!
GROUP JOY âĄ
⢠Focus on motivating participation.
People need social and logical reasons to participate. Before your next gathering, pause your typical script and think about how you can frame the activity so people want to participate to their maximum.
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I just launched the Joymaker Community Blueprint: 10 steps to get your first 100 enthusiastic members. Youâll get the specific actions Iâve taken to create and launch an in-person, conscious, sober community of 500+ members.
ASK THIS QUESTIONâ
Try this question and let me know how itâs received!
Whatâs your career?
Often, people label this question as boring. But I love learning about peopleâs careers. The secret is good follow-up questions.
My answer: After finishing my pharmacology degree, I started leading sober parties. This transitioned into public speaking, which evolved into leadership retreats. Now, I lead leadership programs based on the neuroscience of joy!
LESSONS OF THE WEEK đĽź
What Happens When You Turn a Bus Into a Dance Floor?
What could have been a quiet tour bus ride became a moving rave.
We raised the music. We invited song requests from an Indian couple and a Vietnamese group. Then we played their songs and danced to their culture. The shift was instant. The bus stopped being transportation and became collaboration.
But the most powerful moment wasnât inside the bus. It was outside.
As we drove through the streets, pedestrians lit up. Hands in the air. Huge smiles. Phones out. The emotional reward wasnât just our own joy â it was watching strangers come alive for a few seconds because of us.
Thatâs the core of joymaking: the emotional payoff of lighting other people up.
Energy is contagious â but only when someone initiates.
Key takeaway for group leaders:
Donât wait for the perfect venue or conditions. Leaders create atmosphere. Invite participation early (like song requests) and transform passive environments into shared experiences.
What If Rejection Is Actually a Leadership Superpower?
One night I got separated from my group. Instead of retreating into my phone, I practiced micro ârejection therapyâ â asking for things that might earn me a no.
The goal wasnât success. It was resilience.
What surprised me? People were wildly generous. Someone offered to buy my meal. A group of six people cheered and said, âYouâre the Party Scientist!â
Reality is more negotiable than you think.
We assume people will reject us. We assume theyâll think weâre weird. We assume they wonât engage. Most of the time, those assumptions are wrong. People are more open-minded and risk-tolerant than we give them credit for.
Rejection only stings when you rarely experience it. When normalized, it becomes neutral data.
Key takeaway for group leaders:
Model visible social risk-taking. When leaders demonstrate courage in the face of possible rejection, they lower the fear threshold for everyone in the group.
Why Did a PG-13 Strip Tease Create Instant Bonding?
On a sleeper train heading north, we lined up at the windows as the train rolled through the city and performed a fully clothed, exaggerated, theatrical strip tease.
It wasnât about shock value.
It was about absurdity.
People on the street laughed and waved. Inside the train, we were nervously excited â that edge of risk amplified the fun. We locked eyes with each other, laughing, silently encouraging one another.
Thatâs when I realized something important: joymaking is exponentially better when shared with other Joymakers. The eye contact. The mutual hype. The collective courage.
Play disarms formality. It gives people permission to loosen up.
Key takeaway for group leaders:
Use light, playful theatrics to lower inhibition. Shared risk and shared laughter create rapid bonding and emotional safety.
Are You Climbing the Mountain â or Missing It?
We arrived in a mountain village and immediately began trekking upward with our guide. The views were stunning.
But I noticed something uncomfortable: I was focused on getting to the top.
Life is a figurative mountain. If youâre always trying to arrive somewhere, you miss the experience of climbing. Even during rest stops, I felt rushed.
The deeper insight? The journey becomes meaningful through human connection. When you stop striving and start relating, presence increases. In conversation especially, if youâre trying to âget somewhere,â authenticity shrinks. When youâre not trying to arrive, emotional safety expands.
Iâm still practicing this.
Key takeaway for group leaders:
Incorporate shared physical challenges â but emphasize connection over completion. Group identity strengthens when the journey matters more than the summit.
What Does a Blind Rice Farmer Teach About Gratitude?
At the base of the mountain, we saw a blind rice farmer working the fields. Our guide told us his story. We stood silently for ten minutes watching him work.
Every complaint I had dissolved.
Human nature doesnât default to gratitude. It defaults to adaptation â the hedonic treadmill. What once amazed us becomes normal. We raise our standards. We forget to appreciate.
Seeing someone living in poverty without sight lowered my threshold for gratitude.
Thatâs the practice: lowering the threshold until small things â sight, breath, mobility â feel extraordinary.
Gratitude isnât just a thought. Itâs a sensation. When it appears, even faintly, amplify it. Cherish it. Let it expand in the body. The more you reinforce the feeling, the more accessible it becomes.
Travel expands geography. But more importantly, it expands empathy.
Key takeaway for group leaders:
Design perspective-shifting moments. Exposure to different life realities deepens gratitude, softens judgment, and strengthens compassion within your community.
Next week, Iâll share lessons from leading a street flash mob in Vietnam, attending a local Hmong festival, and meeting a Vietnamese billionaire.
â Jacques
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