🧪Party Science Experiment #20


You’re one of 901 human connection professionals🥼who read or listen to this newsletter.

Whether you’re here to grow your business, master facilitating belonging, or elevate your mindset & vitality—what unites us is the belief that human connection is the elixir of life 🧪

As a token of appreciation for the care I put into this, can you forward this to one facilitator, community-builder, or human connection professional?

At last, let’s dance 💕🙌


Make decisions based on trust, not money.

—Virginia Salas Kastilio, CEO of Humans I Trust, emphasizing the long-term approach and relationship-building


My dear friends at Authentic Revolution are offering us a special code for the Authentic Life Course!—Level up your human connection skills and watch your well-being skyrocket.


One thing I believe deeply—the more time we spend in authentic connection with others, the happier we are. Check out the syllabus.


Feel the room.

Are your guests in a state where they can fully participate in the proposed activity? Are they familiar enough with one another? When we feel the room, we can determine what our guests can handle and receive.


Tell stories about your community members.

If you’re doing things right, for one thing, you have community members, not customers. When you give credit and show off your community members, it makes them feel good, and it improves trust in your product.

See below: The Circle of Awesomeness.


Stop snacking.

Snacking is not good for your dental and metabolic health. Snacking prevents you from accessing ketosis. Shared, long sit-down meals with friends are much better for our well-being.


LIFE LESSON: Approach conflict collaboratively.

I had a conflict with my mentor, BFF, and playmate recently. We have been traveling together and crushing it wherever we go. At universal studios, we even started a dance party in the hotel lobby.

I absolutely admire her communication skills.

Recently, we had a little co-fuffle together. I stated an observation after a long day that she had disrupted an interaction I had been having. After sharing my feelings, I felt like there was a lot of resistance in understanding where I was coming from. I kept hearing AND feeling—‘I disagree and do not want to try to understand you.’

I learnt that this impression was my own creation.

After resolving and reflecting on the conversation, I realized that I had approached it one-sidedly. Instead of making it a collaborative discussion about human connection, I had made it about her behaviour. It was unsolicited feedback. It was insulting to her.

I learnt that I had no expressed curiosity toward her views and feelings. I was in lecture-mode, instead of question-mode.

To approach conflict collaboratively, ask questions about the other person’s experience, intentions, and reflections. And… go slow. Choose your words carefully.

BUSINESS LESSON: The people are the product.

Especially as a community-builder, this lesson has really transformed how I operate my business. The reality is, a community or event experience is influenced by who is there. If who is there do not practice solid human connection skills. If who is there do not align with the purpose you have laid out. If who is there is there to spectate instead of contribute.

If this is the case…then the product will become less valuable to the people who are there for the right reasons, who are there fully, who are there to connect and contribute. All this to say, be careful who you select to be in your community. It only takes one socially incompetent person to wreck the vibe for everyone.

This principle also applies from a branding perspective. Are the people participating in your community the people that you want potential customers to visualize when they think about your product? The people associated with your product determine the brand of your product. So do not let your community be infiltrated by the wrong people.

For the health and brand of your community, it’s important to set up boundaries. Do not make it for everyone.


Lyle and I have been meeting online since 2019. He is a techno-optimist and believes in the use of technology for advancing education and mental health. His company, Andromeda, designs VR and AR games. Join his newsletter.




How to be Happy Study. Research Article.

Tarzan Kay, email marketing guru. Newsletter.

Katya, Founder of the Inheritance Project. About.

Nicole Gibson, CEO of LoveOutLoud. Movement.



Pause somewhere and stretch. Ideally in public.

PS: JOIN MY INSIDER LIST for $1/week when you’re ready for deeper insights and personal invitations 🙏

Remind fellow human connection professionals you care about their success and well-being.

Be thoughtful—Forward this to them.

Don’t forget, your body and belonging matters too, be-you-tiful.

—Jacques W. Martiquet, The International Party Scientist